Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Die It.

Lets face it. Food is good. Though there are a few particular food products that do not appeal to me personally, on the whole, food is generally a pleasure to partake of. I've never met a human who didn't enjoy some type of food at some point in their lifetime (<- not a plug for the cable channel). Because we as people have determined that we like food, it has created an enormous market with an unending supply of demand (see what I did there?). The more people eat, the more our supply is used up and therefore our demand for food increases as a direct result of food becoming more scarce...because we ate it.

Food is like entertainment, it isn't necessary to sustain life but does bring enjoyment and happiness to a person. Sure, it's easier and cheaper to just have everyone eating their meals through an I.V. you could control obesity and make sure that everyone got the nutrients that their body needs. Productivity would increase since everyone would have at least an extra 3 hours a day (more for chefs and housewives) that they aren't spending to sit down and eat or prepare food. Animal rights organizations such as PETA would have to do extreme downsizing if not shut down completely. Hunting would become a civil duty to keep animal populations down and everyones teeth would be much healthier. Homeless people would never go hungry since the government will be able to supply everyone with I.V.s using all the money they save from not paying for food. As a result of not eating food, peoples' other senses would become more acute and powerful to compensate for losing the sense of taste. We'd be able to see better, smell better, touch/feel better, and hear better. Kitchens would become unneeded as would expensive appliances and cooking equipment, every house in America would suddenly have an extra room.

Actually, this is starting to sound pretty good

Eliminate food and you eliminate poverty, sickness, and the need for taste buds. This new I.V. diet will be called The Carpe Seizure Cool People Eating Habit of Awesomeness and Strength or the IV Diet for short. The only downside is that billions of jobs would be lost and if you woke up in the middle of the night craving a ham and cheese sandwich, tough luck. I can live with that.

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